Svenson, out in his pasture in northern Minnesota, took a

lightning-quick kick from a cow…right in his crotch. Writhing in agony, he

fell to the ground.

As soon as he could manage, he took himself to the doctor. He

said: "How bad is it Doc? I’m going on my honeymoon next veek and my fiance,

Lena , is still a Virgin – in every vay."

The doctor told him "Olaf, I’ll have to put your willy in a splint

to let it heal, and keep it straight. It should be okay next week, but leave it

on dere as long as you can." He took four tongue depressors and formed a neat

little 4 sided splint, and taped it all together…quite an impressive work of


Olaf mentioned none of this to Lena, married her, and they went on

their honeymoon to Duluth .

That night in the Motel 6, Lena ripped open her blouse to reveal

her beautiful, untouched breasts. She said: "Olaf…you’ re the first vun! No

vun has EVER seen deez."

Olaf immediately dropped his pants and replied: "Look at dis Lena

….still in DA CRATE!


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